The Seven Year Itch

At some point growing up I learned the phrase 'Seven Year Itch'  I learned it in the context of marriage and after seven years couples can get bored with each other and want to scratch some itches.  Eyes wander, people stray, the potential for divorce becomes more likely. 

I realized earlier this month that I have owned my house for seven years.  The longest I have lived anywhere since I was thirteen.  I was thirteen in 1983.  You can do the math and see that that is quite a block of time. 

I have decided my house has 'the seven year itch' and is trying to break up with me.  I am going to let it.  Sometimes, when a relationship is over, it is best for both parties to walk away.  Well, my significant other is a house and can not physically walk away, I am going to do the stepping for it.  It officially will go on the market September first of this year. 

I can give you a list (a list from me? shocked I know) of the reasons this relationship is not working out.  Reason number one, I like to have a life.  The thought of staying home and doing yard work just makes me want to sink into a fluffy chair and take a nap, or tie a ribbon in my hair, call some friends and make a party.  The thought of giving up social hour or nap time for yard work is just an unrealistic goal.  Even as I am typing I should be out helping my yard have some curb appeal before I try to sell it. 
Reason number two - I do not care how new the house is, how it looks to be in great shape, it is a money pit that will suck every last dollar from your savings and then some.  If you are not a handy person, or you try to be but end up with broken thumbs, pulled muscles, a lung infection, cuts in weird places and bruises down the middle of your head then you are destined to hire out.  Hiring out is never ever cheap.  EVER.

Reason number three - A washing machine can cause a lot of interference in a relationship and while it is never good to point fingers while determining blame, a washing machine that decides to dump about 1500 gallons of water in your basement can cause permanent damage to a house/owner relationship.

I should have known this relationship wasn't meant to be when after only a couple of months in to the relationship a fire happened to kill some landscaping and a bird flew in the closet through a hole in the roof, my sidewalk broke and my garage hit my truck...three times.  All of these are signs.

While all of these milestones in my house/owner relationship have taught me valuable lessons and while the house now has a new roof, new windows, new furnace, new carpet in the basement, and new landscaping this only adds to the face value of the house being a good partner and leaves me feeling like the failure.  I look at it this way, I made the house relationship ready for the next fool owner.

It's not me, it's you..house.